


Drawn to the Blood

by spellboundnora



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Brainwashing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally Abusive Relationships, Gaslighting, How Do I Tag, Jasper (Camp Camp) Lives, Kidnapping, M/M, Memory Alteration, Memory Loss, Panic Attacks, Unhealthy Relationships, buckle up motherfuckers shit goes down in this one, i guess, i had a really fun time writing it tho, this was a fucking head trip to write and it's gonna b one to read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-12 12:03:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18446177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spellboundnora/pseuds/spellboundnora
Summary: "David wondered who had first said that falling in love was just like falling asleep, because it seemed to him to be the most accurate thing in the world. Falling in love with his Daniel had been like curling up in bed after finishing a warm cup of tea and a good book, and letting a well-deserved slumber overtake him after a long day. And the metaphor fit so well, too, because his Daniel was like a dream, flawless and ethereal, having fallen into his life with a beautiful future set up for the two of them, just like when he’d fall into a dream and know exactly what he was doing there."





	Drawn to the Blood

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, author here, just letting you know I highly fucking recommend that you listen to the album Carrie and Lowell by Sufjan Stevens while reading, not only because it is great and where I stole the title from, but also because it fits the mood of this fic absolutely perfectly. It's beautiful and soft, and full of things that sound like love songs, but oh yeah, that nice smooth voice singing over the gentle acoustics is repeating into your ears the words "we're all gonna die."

David wondered who had first said that falling in love was just like falling asleep, because it seemed to him to be the most accurate thing in the world. Falling in love with his Daniel had been like curling up in bed after finishing a warm cup of tea and a good book, and letting a well-deserved slumber overtake him after a long day. And the metaphor fit so well, too, because his Daniel was like a dream, flawless and ethereal, having fallen into his life with a beautiful future set up for the two of them, just like when he’d fall into a dream and know exactly what he was doing there. Daniel fit into his existence like a puzzle piece, the two of them were a perfect match, they were soulmates. David would listen to anything his Daniel told him, because he was never wrong. Daniel knew everything, or at least, everything worth knowing. He would do anything for Daniel, just as he knew Daniel would do anything for him. Because they were made for each other. He didn’t think about much besides Daniel these days, but what else was worth thinking about? Now that he’d dropped out of college because Daniel said it was just a distraction, and he’d stopped talking to those people, because Daniel said they were just trying to break the two of them up, he had all day to devote to taking care of his Daniel while he was home, and tidying up and thinking about him when he was working.

Who were those people he used to hang out with before Daniel? He couldn’t quite remember their names. A girl, and a boy. Their appearances were lost to his mind as well. He did know that he had known the boy for longer than the girl, and had grown up with him. The girl had only entered his life in the last few years, from what he could recall. They were good, or at least they used to be, until Daniel. After he met his soulmate, they argued a lot. He couldn’t remember what they yelled at him about, but it couldn’t have been good. Daniel had said they were jealous, that they loved him, but it had been an inferior kind of love. That they couldn’t process the kind of bond he shared with Daniel, and just wanted David all to themselves. Daniel had told him to stop talking to them, that their arguments would get nowhere, because even though David cared about them, they were too greedy, and wouldn’t accept his love for another. That had made him sad, but his Daniel had comforted him, telling him that all they needed was each other, that nothing mattered except for their love. And Daniel was never wrong, so slowly he came to see it too. He didn’t need anyone besides Daniel, just like college, those people had just been distractions.

Daniel was away, he was working. David thought he worked too much, but his Daniel told him the work he did helped people, that it was important. He would always say that once his work was finished, all that would matter in his life would be David. That made him happy. But he did miss Daniel greatly, especially when he would be gone for days at a time. David wasn’t good at doing things on his own. That was the only thing that made him imperfect in Daniel’s eyes. He felt like he used to be able to do things well, but his brain was so foggy sometimes now, that he could barely remember how to make instant noodles. Daniel had taught him many important things, but they never seemed to stick in his brain for very long. The only thing that did stick in his brain was Daniel. He was all that really mattered, anyway. He vaguely felt hungry, and couldn’t remember the last time he’d eaten, but he was on the couch, wrapped up in a blanket, and he was so warm, and so comfortable, that he didn’t want to move. The television was on, it was playing static. He liked the static, it was comforting. Daniel didn’t want him to watch real television, he said it would make him distracted and worried, just like he had been before he’d met Daniel, and he didn’t want that to happen again, did he? No, he didn’t recall much of his life before Daniel, but it couldn’t have been good, not as good as it was with him. His life was perfect now, it was simple, and it was calm. The only people he saw in his day were Daniel, and his work partner, Jen. Jen did work things with him. He didn’t know what she did, but he didn’t know what he did either, so it didn’t matter. Daniel didn’t like Jen very much, he found her distracted and conceited. Daniel sometimes said that almost all of humanity was deeply flawed, but that he and David were a few of the lucky ones. They were nearly perfect. David knew he wasn’t perfect, but his Daniel? His Daniel didn’t have a single flaw in him.

He heard a knocking at the door to their apartment. It wasn’t Daniel, he had a key, he would just come in.

“Jen? Is that you? Did you misplace your keys again?”

Jen would come over sometimes when Daniel wasn’t home. She wouldn’t talk to David much, just go into Daniel’s office and do work things. David wasn’t allowed in Daniel’s office. He always said that his work would just confuse David, and that David didn’t need anything confusing in his life. David didn’t mind, if Daniel’s work was something that he needed to know about, then his Daniel would’ve told him. Daniel told him about all of the important things. David heard voices behind the door, saying something he couldn’t make out. That was strange, they didn’t sound like Daniel or Jen. They must have the wrong apartment, then, because the only people that ever came to the apartment were Daniel and Jen. Daniel always said that having too many people around would only confuse David. Well, the least he could do would be to try to point them in the right direction, even if he didn’t know any of his neighbors, he could try to help them find their way to where they should be. He got up from the couch, briefly noting how his stomach hurt. Perhaps he should try to make some food when this was all over. He opened the door, gazing upon two people who seemed about his age. A boy and a girl. They looked at him with unreadable expressions, and he smiled at them. The poor things, they must be lost.

“Hello there, I think you must have the wrong apartment, for I do not know you, and I am quite sure Daniel would have told me if he was planning on having guests over while he was at work. I am afraid I cannot be of much help in locating the place you are supposed to be, either, as I do not know any of my neighbors. Unless you are new neighbors, come to introduce yourselves. In which case, I am sorry, my name is David. You may come in, if you would like.”

The boy and the girl just stared at him. The boy’s eyes were wide, like he was surprised, or even afraid. The girl’s were narrowed in a way that made him wonder if he had done something.

“I am sorry, did I say something wrong? I try my best to keep a calm and friendly demeanor, but sometimes I mess up my words, as my brain can be rather foggy. I am too unused to having people around that are not my Daniel, or his work partner, Jen. I am but an imperfect being.”

The boy and the girl were acting rather peculiar now, and he wondered if it was him at all, or something else making them act that way. The boy had taken a step back and had tears in his eyes. The girl was still staring at him in a way that made him want to hide under a pile of blankets.

“Do you, really, not recognize us? Or is this all some sick game to you, a final way of cutting us out of your life? I knew we shouldn’t have come here. We wasted all of this effort to track you down, for you to go into fucking weirdo mode the second we show up.”

The girl spat the words out like she had a personal vendetta against them. The boy looked as if he was going to try to calm her down, but could not calm himself down.

“I am very sorry, are you sure you are not mistaking me for someone else? The two of you seem slightly familiar, but only the kind of familiarity that comes with seeing one in a dream that you forget as soon as you wake up. I am sorry I cannot help you find who you seek, I do not know you. I… I do not know anyone, besides my Daniel, and to a lesser extent, his Jen. There were other people I knew, at one point, but I do not remember their names, or even their faces. As I said, my brain is very foggy.”

The boy then threw himself at him, sinking to his knees so that his head rested on his stomach, and he pounded on David’s torso with his fists. He felt his shirt become wet with the boy’s tears, as he spoke garbled words through his sobs that David couldn’t make out. The girl looked equal parts concerned and scared. David had no idea what to do. Daniel was never emotional like this, so he just stood, frozen, as the boy sobbed and clutched his shirt. Something within him told him what to do, so gently, he reached down to stroke his hair. He looked up at David in surprise, to which he quickly withdrew his hand. The boy grabbed onto it, and David looked at him in confusion as he started yelling at him.

“What has he done to you? That bastard, that fucking bastard. I’ll kill him! He’s drugged you, or hypnotized you, or something! I’m going to fucking kill him!”

David felt slightly afraid of him, not entirely sure who or what he was talking about.

“Are you speaking of Daniel? Because I guarantee you, he would never do anything to hurt me. He is my soulmate, my perfect lover. Besides his work, I am the only thing in this world that matters to him. I am afraid you are still confused. It is okay, I get confused a lot too. That’s why Daniel says I shouldn’t watch television, or go outside, or ask him about his work. I am imperfect because I am confused, but Daniel tries to make sure it doesn’t happen very often. He loves me.”

The girl spoke again, a more genuine note of disbelief in her voice.

“You really don’t remember us. Holy shit. Do you remember anything?”

“Of course I do! I remember Daniel was here a few days ago, I can’t recall exactly when, but he told me he was going on a work trip, and he’d be back in a while. I remember a few times when Jen has come over, I remember Daniel telling me not to go in his office while he’s away, I remember him teaching me how to make instant noodles, I remember a lot of things!”

“Anything before that? Before Daniel came into your life?”

The girl was studying him carefully, like she was trying to read a book in a language she couldn’t understand.

“I, uh, no. Not much. Daniel found me, I do not remember what happened to me, but he found me, and started teaching me things. I only remember vague feelings before that. I went to school, but it was only a distraction, not one I needed once I had Daniel. There were people. Two people, a boy, and a girl. I knew the boy for a very long time. The girl, only a few years? Maybe more, I do not know. I remember arguments, and Daniel telling me that they loved me, but with an inferior kind of love, one that his love for me overpowered. That they didn’t like that. They wanted me to themselves. So he told me to stop talking to them, and I did. He has never told me anything wrong, so I always listen to him. He has my best interests at heart, he loves me.”

The girl’s eyes narrowed, and the boy gave another sob.

“I’m going to kill that little shit. I don’t know what to say, but everything he’s taught you is wrong. I don’t know what he did to you, but it was something bad to have erased your memories to this extent. I was that girl you knew, Jasp was that boy. My name is Gwen, you’ve probably forgotten that. We were your closest friends, until you met him, one night at a bar. The two of you hit it off, and well, we didn’t trust him. He was always kind of a shady guy, and you were always so trusting, too trusting. One day, we had an argument, and you just left. Left all of your stuff in the dorm you shared with Jasp. Next thing I knew, you were officially unenrolled from college, and you were just gone. It’s been months. We’ve been trying to track you down, we’ve been worried sick that we’d find you dead in a dumpster, or not at all. Or, we’d find you and everything would be fine, and you’d just have hated us so much, you ghosted us completely to hang out with your creepy boyfriend. I’m glad we did. I almost gave up a couple times, but Jasper couldn’t let you go, you know? He had to know what happened.”

“He… what? No. No, no, no. Daniel would never hurt me. Would he? I’m… I’m confused. Why would he erase my memories? That would be silly. He always said my confusion was the one thing that kept me from being perfect. There’s no way he would’ve caused that. He’s been trying to fix it, so I can remember the things he teaches me, so he doesn’t have to do it over and over again. Why would he do that if he was the one causing it?”

The boy’s eyes widened and he… Jasper, stood up, facing him. He spoke with vitriol in his voice that David could tell wasn’t aimed at him.

“You’re right and wrong. He fucked up. He must have meant to erase your old memories, maybe brainwash you to think of him as some kind of god or something, but he fucked it up, and screwed up your ability to make new memories. He’s been trying to fix that part without fixing your old memories. At least, that’s what I assume, from my one psych class. That’s actually where we met Gwen for the first time, we all had psych together freshman year.”

The girl… Gwen, then piped up, her face scrunched up as if she was trying to remember something herself.

“Now, we just have to figure out whether he did something to the memories themselves, or the part of the brain that held them. I’m gonna have to consult a shit ton of textbooks for this. Two and a half years of psych, don’t fail me now.”

David found himself smiling at her without realizing it, and the thought popped in his head that maybe her useless degree might actually be worth something. Wait, that was a weird thought. A psychology degree wasn’t useless, there were many applications for it. Then the boy-Jasper was waving his hand over David’s face and he returned to reality.

“Hey there, Earth to Davey…”

“Sorry, I just had a strange thought. Something I don’t quite have the context for.”

“And what was that?”

“I do not mean to sound rude, but my thought was that maybe Gwen’s useless degree might actually be worth something. I don’t know where it came from.”

The gir-Gwen was laughing then, with tears in her eyes.

“That was something you and Jasp always used to tease me over. That’s a really good sign. He must have done a pretty shit job of brainwashing you if you’ve already got pieces of your old self bleeding through. And damn if that’s not something I’m not thankful for.”

“He really… he really did do it, didn’t he? I, my whole life, my existence, is shaped around him, is… a lie. He was my one constant, my soulmate. But he wasn’t. He did something to me to make me think he was. I’m, I’m scared. And confused. I was happy here, is that a lie too?”

He felt tears start to fall, and then Jasper’s arms were around him. Giving him a proper hug this time. He was warm and felt nice. Daniel was never very physical, except for in the bedroom, and there he was rough, always rough. Jasper was soft, and David felt like he could disintegrate into his arms. He felt another pair of arms around him and there was Gwen, a sheepish smile on her face.

“I was never much of a hugger, except for you. You always gave the best hugs, David. I remember back when we first met, and you had half a foot on me, you’d pick me up and spin me around like I was a kid. Well, you still have half a foot on me, I just wear boots with heels now.”

She laughed as she spoke, and David swore he could feel the vibrations of it within his very soul. He felt… safe, here between them. He had felt a lot of good emotions around Daniel, whether or not he was brainwashed to feel them, but this kind of safety and comfort was new to him. 

“We need to go into his office.”

David broke away from the embrace, as wonderful as it felt, they had a job to do. And that job was to try to undo whatever Daniel had done to him.

“His office?”

David turned to Jasper, who had posed the question, and sighed. He felt nervous even thinking about going in there, but it would probably help.

“Daniel’s office. He always said that I’m not allowed to go in there, that his work doesn’t matter to me, and that it’ll just confuse me.”

Gwen finished the other half of his sentence that he didn’t say.

“But maybe that was a lie, and he thought what’s in his office would snap you out of whatever trance he put you in.”

“Well, you guys are already helping to do that. I feel real, grounded, for the first time in… as long as I can remember. I always felt floaty, like I wasn’t exactly connected to reality. Maybe that’s why he wouldn’t let me go outside and talk to people. He always said that would just confuse me too.”

“Alright, how about you and Gwen search his office, and I’ll look around the rest of the place? You might be able to identify anything he’s told you about his work, or you’ve overheard, and Gwen, with you being an official shrink in training, you can probably find all of the psych stuff he used on David. I’ll just make sure there’s nothing else shady in the house that Davey didn’t pick up on while brainwashed.”

“That sounds good, Jasp. Let’s go through the forbidden door and unlock the secrets of your universe, Davey.”

That line felt familiar to David in a way he couldn’t describe, perhaps it was just something she’d said before. Nevertheless, the three of them stepped inside the apartment and split up. David could feel apprehension building as they headed for the door to Daniel’s office, but tried to dismiss it as just the strings Daniel still pulled on his mind trying to control him. The door was looked, with a four-digit keypad.

“Shit. Any idea what this could be? Are there any numbers that seemed important to Daniel?”

David closed his eyes and tried to concentrate, the normal fog in his brain seeming to have transformed itself into dark clouds hiding even his memories of Daniel from him. Finally, something came to him. They were sitting at the dining table and David had asked Daniel when he would be done with his work. Daniel had smiled and told him that it would be a while, that his work was important, but that everything would be wrapped up in a few years and then they could spend eternity together. That in 2020, it would all be over. He didn’t even bother to think about what that meant now, not entirely sure he wanted to know what Daniel’s work was anymore.

“Try 2020. He said once that it was the year his work would be finished.”

Gwen input the year in the keypad and the door made a soft beeping sound and was unlocked. They stepped in the room, and David’s eyes swept the place that had been forbidden to him for as long as he’d lived here. Against one wall was a desk with a computer, another held a filing cabinet with the bottom drawer open, displaying a dozen or so folders. There were large bottles of bleach next to the filing cabinet, and a bulk box of purple kool-aid powder. On the wall opposite from the desk, stood a workstation that had a strange device with an abundance of wires sticking out and tools scattered haphazardly nearby. The device looked almost like a motorcycle helmet, with the top made of metal, with a section of exposed wires and other electronics. One bunch of wires ran from the top of the device all the way to the computer. Gwen sighed, mumbling something under her breath that David couldn’t make out.

“What is all of this?”

“I guess we better find out. Does that freaky ass device look at all familiar to you?”

“I- I don’t know. I’m going to take a look at it.”

“Sounds good to me, I’m gonna read these files. Wonder what juicy info he has in here?”

David wandered over to the workstation, picking up the device and turning it over in his hands. The visor appeared to be covered so it would be completely dark, and there was a set of headphones built into it. Without thinking, he slipped it on. Nothing happened, except it was very dark and he felt incredibly uneasy. He was about to take it back off and tell Gwen he had no idea what it was, when fragments of memories and static flashed through his mind.

He showed up to — apartment, crying, because he’d just had a fight with —. Daniel had told him —. He’d make him a drink, he’d just gotten some nice — that he was going to save for a special occasion, but they could drink it now, watch a — movie. They were watching — and drinking the champagne. David’s tasted —. He found it hard to keep his eyes —. He woke up, and was in —. He was tied to a — chair that Daniel had dragged in here. The man was tinkering with something he couldn’t see. He wanted to — but he had a gag in his —. Daniel turned to him and —. He whispered to David that — mattered but the two of them, and that after this, they could truly be —. He walked over to — and David could hear him typing. Daniel placed — on his head. Everything went dark. He heard — speaking in his ears. They said some things that he couldn’t make out, and some he could. Telling him he needed to let go. That he would be — here. Daniel was his —. Daniel loved him. Daniel was the only thing that mattered. — was just a distraction. That he would remember none of —.

His past didn’t matter. Only Daniel mattered.  
His past didn’t matter. Only Daniel mattered.  
His past didn’t matter. Only Daniel mattered.  
His past didn’t matter. Only Daniel mattered.  
His past didn’t matter. Only Daniel mattered.

When he awoke, he felt — and fuzzy. He was in a — alley and Daniel was — over him.

“Thank god you’re awake! — really roughed you up, I was afraid I was going to have to take you to the —! I can’t believe we got mugged, those guys were terrifying. Luckily I gave them my — and they went away. You didn’t have to be so protective of me, you could’ve gotten really —! But maybe I’m a little glad you did. Seeing you be all tough and — made my heart race. How are you feeling?” 

“Daniel. I… I don’t remember —. Just you. I — even remember my own name. What's — —?”

“Oh, —, you must have hit your head. Your — is David, of course. Don’t worry, I’ll help you regain all of your —.”

David ripped the device off of his head threw it as far away from him as he could. The bright lights of the room hurt his eyes for a second, before he got used to them. Gwen was staring at him in concern, an open folder in her hands. He could feel himself breathing fast. Too fast.

“How long was I like that?”

“A few minutes, why? What happened, are you okay?”

“I, I know what happened. I know what happened. Everything is a lie. Gwen, everything in my head is a lie that he put there. I don’t know who I am!”

“Shit, you’re hyperventilating. Let’s have a seat on the floor. Everything is going to be okay. Jasper, come in here! I think he’s having a panic attack!”

David sat on the floor, his back against the corner, his hands wrapped around his knees. Gwen sat on her knees in front of him, looking terrified.

“Hey, hey, hey, just breathe. Things are going to be okay. We’re going to figure out what happened and we’re going to reverse it. We’ll get your memories back.”

“And what if you can’t? My brain is made of lies! I don’t know anything, Gwen!”

“Even if we can’t, that means we’ll just have to make new ones.”

He heard footsteps and flinched. It was Daniel, he was coming to hurt him and fill his mind with lies again. But then another figure crouched down next to him, and no, it was Jasper.

“Hey, Davey. We’re going to fix this, together. Just focus on breathing. Match my breaths, in and out.”

Jasper took long, slow breaths, and David attempted to mimic them until he felt like he could breathe again, and the weight of the lies he’d been fed all this time wasn’t going to crush him. He managed a shaky smile through the tears he didn’t even realize had been flowing down his face.

“I know what happened to me. I got some of my memories back, only a few, fragmented ones, when I had that thing on. It wasn’t doing anything, just reminding me of what happened. After we had that fight, Daniel put something in my drink to make me fall asleep, and when I woke up, I was tied to a chair and he put that thing on me. It had all kinds of messages, and eventually I fell asleep so I don’t know if he did anything to me after that, but when I woke up, I was in an alley, and he lied and made up a story saying we’d been mugged, and when I told him I couldn’t remember anything, he said I must have hit my head. From the beginning, it’s all been lies.”

“Can I give you a hug, or would you rather not be touched right now?”

“I think I’d like that.”

Jasper wrapped his arms around David again, and David sunk into him.

“I just want to get out of here. I don’t want to see him ever again. I don’t know what I’ll do if I see him.”

“Me too, Davey. I think I’d go crazy if I saw him right now, I’d kill him or something. We can leave soon if you want.”

“I’ll gather up the rest of these papers. They’re mostly notes on the machine, and details on things… that I’d rather not talk about right now. We can head out after that.”

“Should we take the machine? Is there any hope it will help me get my memories back?”

“No, but I think we can get at least some of them back on our own.”

“I found something too, in the kitchen. A bottle of unmarked pills. One of the pharmacy kids owes me a favor, I can get him to analyze them.”

“Should we go then? If you two have everything you need?”

“Yeah. We can call a cab back to your and Jasp’s dorm. Luckily, they haven’t gotten around to assigning him a new roommate yet.”

Jasper stood up and pulled David to his feet. Gwen quickly opened the rest of the doors of the filing cabinet and grabbed the folders inside. The three of them headed out of the office, and back into the main area of the apartment.

“Do you have anything you want to take with you, Davey?”

“No, I didn’t really have anything of my own. It was all Daniel’s stuff.”

“Alright, boys, let’s head for home.”

They left the apartment, and David knew he wouldn’t miss it. The place was never a home to him, just a comfortable prison, both physically and mentally. And now, he’d broken out of both.


End file.
